Want Some More Candy?

We didn' t grow up with much candy in our house. Our 92 year old baby sitter Mrs. Weinerman used to bring Heidels and me goody bags filled with Blow Pops and Bazooka and Tootsie Rolls. Stuff my mom never bribed us with. I was 8 years old when I told my mom that Mrs. Weinerman fell asleep on the job. Mrs. Weinerman often passed out during the Lawrence Welk Musical Hour. Who wouldn't? I actually have two pretty hip friends who have fond memories of watching that nightmarish show with their grandparents. We had no grandparents and Mrs. Weinerman was as good as dead. God knows what Heidels and I did while Mrs. Weinerman snored through the Lennon sisters. I think we waved bubble wands around Mrs. Weinerman so she would dream of Lawrence Welk. Anyway when Mrs. Weinerman finally really did die in her sleep candy became history for me and Heids. RIP candy, I mean Mrs. Weinerman.

Now for the most part, as a vegan I know what I can and cannot eat. I figured milk chocolate is out of the question. I boned up on candies a few years ago and read Candy Freak, an awesome book by Steve Almond. Smarty pants, here also knows that caramel is derived from milk. Late last week I whipped up my own vegan version and not particularly healthy version of that substance. Still it makes pretty awesome brownie topping and candy.
I did not know until last week why turtle candy was called turtle candy. I rightly assumed that no turtle was harmed in this confection. Bet you can't guess why they are called turtles.

Yes, my friend they are called turtles due to an uncanny resemblance to a turtle. Had I known that pre-refrigeration, I would have added an extra foot or something to the turtle on the bottom right. These are made with walnuts, but I've also made them with pecans and they work with both. They looked so good I mistakenly bit into the side of the plate.

Recipe
1 batch of vegan caramel (click on link)
1 C pecans or walnuts
1 C vegan chocolate chips

Line tray with parchment. Divide nuts into 4 batches. Make vegan caramel. Set aside. Melt chocolate in double boiler. Cover nuts with with about 1.5 T of chocolate. Top with same amount of caramel and then top with chocolate again. Freeze for about an hour. Partake.

If you've been around the vegan block I'm sure you already know that Oreos and TJ's JoJos are indeed vegan. But get this. Shock of all shocks. I was reading the deservedly much  touted Melisser Elliot's
the Vegan Girl's Guide to Life last night
 (the book I was supposed to receive from the publisher last October...harrumph)
and found out that Noah's Bagels adds a little somethin-somethin to their bagels called duck feathers. Say No to Noah's! I would eat a Noah's bagel with hummus about twice a year if that. Now I gotta wonder what Noah's puts in their hummus-pate?  Disgusted enough? Melisser says, stay away from those Planter's Peanuts too. They are laden with gelatin. Happy trails.

That Potato is Loaded

For some doggone reason I thought the V-Day rush would be over before V-Day. Bahahaha.  NO not another pink frosting! To counteract the pink and red sprinkly stuff this week we whipped up some kick ass caramel sauce. This caramel is so versatile that it can top vegan ice creams, be swirled into frostings, top apples, whatever your little vegan heart can dream up. We had it over some spiced apples with a dollop of vanilla soy yogurt. I've been experimenting with so much of this gooey sauce that maybe I should move to Carmel, California. Actually, I'm in sugar shock right now and wrote this blog in less than 10 seconds. I will have to go on a detoxifying diet tomorrow. I will not approach the scale 'til Monday...because I also ate this.

And this potato was so loaded it got stopped by a cop. Yuk! Yuk. Beep Beep.

Caramel Sauce
1 Cup of Earth Balance
1/2 C Organic Brown sugar
1/2 C Corn Syrup
1/2 tsp Baking soda
1/4 tsp Sea salt

Melt 1 cup of Earth Balance in heavy saucepan. Add brown sugar and corn syrup. Stir constantly, bring to slow boil and then down to a simmer. Stir in baking soda and remove from heat, but keep stirring until, (it'll foam up-it's supposed to), it's the consistency you want. Don't worry that pretty head of yours if you want it thick just keep that wooden spoon moving!

I'll be back with the loaded potato recipe as soon as the potato gets out of jail.