Breakfast at the Mansion

I am a voracious reader. Yep. I read everything from cookbooks to gluten free cereal boxes. I imagine most bloggers read a lot. Still, I tend to mix up Gothic romance plots. I mean there are fires, and servants, madness and alcoholism in almost every book from Bronte through
Du Maurier. I get mixed up with whose portrait or person is in the attic and who kicked the bucket. My birthday is in a few days. I hope somebody puts a portrait of me in their attic. I need to slow down the ravages of time. Vegan moisturizer isn't that great.
My smarty pants friend, Marcia made me reread Rebecca, because I still confuse
Mrs. De Winters with Jane Eyre. Now I am less befuddled, but really, Mrs. De Winters is kind of a moron. I mean I don't care how naive or how new she is to Manderley, who in their right mind would allow this creepy donkey face Danvers create their menu for them. Let's switch up the heroines  for a moment, shall we?

GiGi De Winters: Yes, I would very much like to see the menu for the mansion, Mrs. D.
Mrs. Danvers: You can trust me, to make fantastic meals for you and Mr. De Winters.
GiGi De Winters: Um, yeah...I don't think so, Mrs. Dee. Last time you used a lot of butter and eggs, when I specifically ordered tofu scrambles for Maxim and me. I refuse to starve in this mansion.

GiGi De Winters and Mrs. Danvers argue about eggs.
Too bad Gothic novels don't have photoshop.

Mrs. Danvers: I didn't know what a Vagun was.
GiGi De Winters: Oh stop. It's pronounced vee-gun even in English Gothic romances. That's it! You are forbidden to watch "Paula's Home Cooking" anymore.
Mrs. Danvers: (Mrs. Danvers screams) but... but Madame, Rebecca always watched Paula Deen with me.
GiGi De Winters: Oh Rebecca this, Rebecca that. They'll be no Paula Deen at Manderley.
Mrs. Danvers: As you wish. (Mrs. Danvers exits)
GiGi De Winters: (calls after Mrs. Danvers) Oh BTW tomorrow I'll make my own breakfast!!! I have to fit into that shmata for the fancy dress ball.

Does this hat match? Eh, Doesn't matter Mr. De Winter is half blind. Wait, never mind, that's Jane Eyre's hubby who's blind.

GiGi De Winter's Manderley Breakfast (will feed two gluten free Gothic characters)

1 pouch of TJ's frozen brown rice or 2 C cooked brown rice

8 oz of coconut milk

1 rice cake (broken up)

1/4 C dried apricots (chopped)

1/4 C dried dates (chopped)

1/4 C dried cherries (chopped)

1/2 C pecans (chopped)

1/4-1/2 C agave or brown sugar

1 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp nutmeg or allspice

Open the pouch of TJ's, (luckily there is a TJ's right around the corner from the mansion), frozen brown rice and dump it into the sauce pan. Heat for about a minute over medium heat. Stir. (You can do this with your cooked rice too). Add the coconut milk, and sweetener. Stir. Heat for about 5 minutes. Stir in chopped fruits and nuts. Add broken up rice cake and spices. Cook 'til hot. Add more coconut milk and sweeten as needed.

GiGi De Winters: (yells from breakfast table) You better not be watching Paula Deen, Mrs. Danvers!
Mrs. Danvers: Bahahahaha.
GiGi De Winters: Oh crap I smell smoke. 



Disclaimer
For those who have read this prior to my guest post over at Veganosaurus, Rebecca's ghost published this before I was able to get this to Susmitha. I will let you know when it airs over there. There will be an introduction that won't be included here. And if you don't already know my buddy, Susmithy, please visit her kick ass blog.

Thanks for having me Susmithey. Sorry gotta run.

The Slothful Vegan

Zzz... Oh sorry forgot I was blogging there for a minute. Didn't know you were here. Hi! Today is a minuscule blog. Today is Labor Day, a day to celebrate no labor and a wonderful excuse for me to be slothful. Happy Labor Day to the rest of you slugs. (I guess I should put the grin emoticon here so you know I am indeed kidding) Let's try it again. Happy Labor Day to the rest of you slugs ;) ;) wink wink. You freaking slug.

In the time it takes me to finish this blog you could make the fastest dinner ever, not including store bought hummus and store bought edamame rice crackers.

Ready go.

One Bowl Don't Even Cook the Beans Bowl Recipe (2 servings)

1 Packet TJ's Brown Rice (cooked according to box directions) with 2 T water added at end
1 15.5 oz. Can of no lard black beans or pinto bean of your choice (drained, rinsed with hot water)
TJ's Peach Salsa (about 6 T)
1/2 bag TJ's organic butter lettuce
3 T olive oil
2 T balsamic vinegar 
sea salt to taste
optional (dollop of Vegenaise or tofutti sour cream, shredded Follow Your Heart Jack, or Daiya, shot of Tabasco)
Avocado (optional) (although who wants to cut something up and pit something now)

Okay. Get your two bowls lined up. Split greens amongst them. Add vinegar and oil to each with sea salt to taste, (or if you prefer whisk dressing in another bowl). Just keep in mind we are being lazy here so if you use another bowl, it's just one more dish to wash later. Cook brown rice according to directions. I find the rice to stick a little to the pot.To prevent this unfortunate mess, add 1-2 T of water near the end of cooking. Layer rice, beans, salsa in each bowl. Top with whatever your little heart desires. See the "optional" listings.

This dinner is fast, it's cheap, it's easy. This dinner is a floozy!