Hey You, Want Some Candy?

I've been down and out. Me and crazy boy really hit the skids. In my experience, nobody shares almonds. It's hard to get a nutritious meal from the food banks. We once got a fifty pound bag of potato flakes and three 16 ounce jars of sugar and oil laden generic peanut butter. One church attendant called us entitled when I gave back the cans of spam and deviled ham that were in our bounty. Well true, we still had our teeth and a toothbrush to share. We even had  jobs and  we could clean ourselves up in the sink of the local Amtrak lavatory. Hmmm, maybe we were entitled, maybe we were a special kind of homeless couple. Our kind of homeless was way before the 99% occupy was fashionable. We were the one per cent. Homeless employed vegans, but stuff happens even to those who are cruelty free. The good news was that my Bloomies card hadn't totally run out so, I had my last hurrah and ran up credit for a couple of bad ass bras. I guess I could have purchased some almonds or shoes instead of the undies, but it's tough on those mean streets and it's good to feel like you got some under armour.

Chocolate Almond Boats with Strawberry Topping

I've tried making quite a few raw chocolates and thus far this has been my favorite. The chocolate base is from one of my favorite cookbooks, Lacey Sher and Gail Doherty's You Won't Believe It's Vegan.  We also made some bark which was equally delicious.

Chocolate Base
1 C raw cacao nibs
1 C agave
1.5 C coconut oil
pinch of sea salt
1/2 C almond slivers

Blend all ingredients, except almonds in food processor or blender, until completely smooth. Stir in almonds. Pour into candy molds or spread on parchment lined sheet pan. Freeze until firm. Store in freezer until firm.

Almond Mousse Recipe (in the Veganville archives)

Strawberry Topping (also in the Veganville archives, but hidden under the code word blueberry...oh just exchange fruits)
Well it is our sincere hope that this post has given you some food for thought. You can't always judge a book by it's cover. And because we've been through it and have lived to tell it we encourage you to say hi to your local panhandler, give them a smile, some dental floss and some much needed greens. We usually protect our anonymity when it comes to our charitable deeds, but we hope you can follow our example.So, in addition to helping one or two animals every 6 months, Veganville now contributes two jumbo cupcakes every 5th Saturday to our favorite Vet on the street. Next month we will be contributing to Junkie Joe and his pitbull Axe. Won't you?

MoFo Day 23 The Inspiration to Continue to the Iron MoFo Challenge

Yes, sometimes the greatest inspiration comes from someone you don't know that well :) I think I will add her to my speed dial now.

I am so elated after that phone call, that I can now go on, and make this award winning candy. I am so inspired that I have included this week's MoFo secret ingredient in the candy. Shhhhh. Coconut! Don't ask me why but this tastes remarkably like chocolate caramel. Wowie.

Award Winning Raw Candy
4 pitted dates

1/3 C coconut oil, melted or room temperature
3/4 C cocoa powder
1/2 C Agave


Filling


1 T raw peanut butter
2 T almond butter
2 tsp non-alcoholic  vanilla
2 T agave

cacao nibs
shredded  unsweetened coconut


Directions:

1. Combine dates and coconut oil in a small bowl and let soak for 30 minutes.
2. Transfer to food processor and add cocoa powder, 1/2 cup agave and process until very smooth.
3. In a separate bowl, combine peanut butter and almond butter, vanilla and 2 tbsp agave and mix well. (this is the filling) 
4. Place 12 mini muffin cups on a large plate. Fill each cup about halfway full with the chocolate mixture. Gently spread about 1 teaspoon peanut butter in each cup.
5. Top cups with the remaining chocolate, covering the peanut butter completely. Variation: I covered some with coconut and topped with cacao nibs, so I would have a candy assortment.
6. Chill the cups in the freezer for about 2 hours before serving.

While you are waiting for the candy to chill, you can chow down on something else, write your acceptance speech or call another toll free number. Thanx for reading, viewing, etc.

Want Some More Candy?

We didn' t grow up with much candy in our house. Our 92 year old baby sitter Mrs. Weinerman used to bring Heidels and me goody bags filled with Blow Pops and Bazooka and Tootsie Rolls. Stuff my mom never bribed us with. I was 8 years old when I told my mom that Mrs. Weinerman fell asleep on the job. Mrs. Weinerman often passed out during the Lawrence Welk Musical Hour. Who wouldn't? I actually have two pretty hip friends who have fond memories of watching that nightmarish show with their grandparents. We had no grandparents and Mrs. Weinerman was as good as dead. God knows what Heidels and I did while Mrs. Weinerman snored through the Lennon sisters. I think we waved bubble wands around Mrs. Weinerman so she would dream of Lawrence Welk. Anyway when Mrs. Weinerman finally really did die in her sleep candy became history for me and Heids. RIP candy, I mean Mrs. Weinerman.

Now for the most part, as a vegan I know what I can and cannot eat. I figured milk chocolate is out of the question. I boned up on candies a few years ago and read Candy Freak, an awesome book by Steve Almond. Smarty pants, here also knows that caramel is derived from milk. Late last week I whipped up my own vegan version and not particularly healthy version of that substance. Still it makes pretty awesome brownie topping and candy.
I did not know until last week why turtle candy was called turtle candy. I rightly assumed that no turtle was harmed in this confection. Bet you can't guess why they are called turtles.

Yes, my friend they are called turtles due to an uncanny resemblance to a turtle. Had I known that pre-refrigeration, I would have added an extra foot or something to the turtle on the bottom right. These are made with walnuts, but I've also made them with pecans and they work with both. They looked so good I mistakenly bit into the side of the plate.

Recipe
1 batch of vegan caramel (click on link)
1 C pecans or walnuts
1 C vegan chocolate chips

Line tray with parchment. Divide nuts into 4 batches. Make vegan caramel. Set aside. Melt chocolate in double boiler. Cover nuts with with about 1.5 T of chocolate. Top with same amount of caramel and then top with chocolate again. Freeze for about an hour. Partake.

If you've been around the vegan block I'm sure you already know that Oreos and TJ's JoJos are indeed vegan. But get this. Shock of all shocks. I was reading the deservedly much  touted Melisser Elliot's
the Vegan Girl's Guide to Life last night
 (the book I was supposed to receive from the publisher last October...harrumph)
and found out that Noah's Bagels adds a little somethin-somethin to their bagels called duck feathers. Say No to Noah's! I would eat a Noah's bagel with hummus about twice a year if that. Now I gotta wonder what Noah's puts in their hummus-pate?  Disgusted enough? Melisser says, stay away from those Planter's Peanuts too. They are laden with gelatin. Happy trails.

Marshmallows Pillow Talk

I have had numerous posts where I've chastised outdoorsy mountain people for roasting globby white stuff on a stick. I am an activist about this stuff! I mean business here. I feel so vehemently about this that I've even been a lone protester outside little nine year old Hannah's sleepover.

"I know you're in there Hannah!"
"I can smell the S'mores from out here on your corner".
"You and Brownie troupe 522 are killers"! KILLERS. Do you hear me? Those marshmallows are tragic!
A megaphone works wonders here.
KILLERS!
It worked until I had to pay my $5.00 fine for disturbing the peace. What's 5 bucks when you got a mission?
Marshmallows are unseemly. They are deceptive little buggers. Marshmallows seem so cuddly and soft and pillowy and chemical-ee. And they shmush so nice. And when they're drenched with chocolate and, and see, you see how those marshmallows draw you in. Damn candy crack. It's not right. But I don't need to tell you again what they're really made of.

A couple of weeks ago I had a hankering for the kind kind of marshmallow but my local health places were not cooperating. I was about to order some from several suppliers online and everybody was out of stock. Larry's the man. He happened to be picking up some ingredients at WF and lucky for us WF just started carrying Dandies there the day before. Yay!

Remember how the marshmallows of yore tasted like powdery yuk? A Dandies marshmallow has none of that powdery junk on it and is delicious. It might be a little smaller than the old- timey mallows but it's not a marshmallow midget. In addition to gobbling these from the bag, my buddy Mo and I whipped up some bark.

Mallow Bark

We had this on hand:

1 12 oz bag vegan chocolate chips

12 Dandies

1 Cup walnut pieces

1 Cup crushed Jojo's

Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper. Melt chocolate chips in double boiler. When completely melted, stir in remainder of ingredients. Pour onto prepared cookie sheet. Level it out with a wooden spoon or heat proof spatula. Freeze for about an hour. Break into pieces and eat as much as you can and if you can't sleep read the rest of my blogs. 

This bark would rock with dried cherries and roasted almonds but alas we did not have any.

And that's enough pillow talk for tonight.

The Hurry up and Eat Vegan!

I'm thinking of changing the Veganville moniker to "the hurry up, make the meal and scarf it down vegan". Whaddya think?
Did you know if you put Heimlich in the search engine of my blog you can actually find a couple of posts. My mom has been telling me for eons now not to shovel my food. She blames any physical (okay- or mental) problems I've ever had on how fast I eat.
Tonight I made blackened broccoli and vegan sausage in record time and then ate it all under a minute.
Last night I wokked up some cabbage slaw and lemon tofu in a pan with some minced garlic and served it over that speedy cooking rice pasta. I added some sesame oil, a dash of soy and rice vinegar and a sprinkle of sesame seeds. I snorted it down. I think it was very good.
Larry is a very slooooow eater. It takes him about a day to eat one baby broccoli spear. But unlike my mommy, he does not reprimand. Instead he says, "Why don't you leave the table and look at your Etsy activity page".  I'm out of there like a heartbeat.
My buddy Mo eats fast and talks fast and thinks fast. The other night Mo wanted to make stuffed portabellos again. I filched some additional ideas from unsuspecting bloggers so Mo and I could make some new stuff to accompany the shrooms. It took us a while to whip everything up and then we had a race. This was two days ago. Larry is still eating.
Here's what we had for dessert. I'll start with dessert mainly because the other pics suck.

Pre Refrigeration

I call these "Good Noshy Ganachey" I was peeking around the web and found something real similar over at Vegan Craftastic or Brooklyn Fantastic and Mo and I made a variation. Free country right. I mean my cracker is your cracker.

Right Before Mo and Me and Larry partook



The Improvisation: Sweet and Salty

Line a baking pan with parchment paper.

We used Early July Organic "ritz-like" crackers.

I had leftover PB frosting from an order and we spread it between two crackers. You can use a bit of PB mixed with powdered sugar or PB mixed with agave or PB and strawberry preserves. I melted vegan chocolate chips in a double boiler and Mo got to swirling the crackers with a spatula. Line up on the parchment. Add multi-color sprinkles or chopped nuts.

They are amazingly good. We ate so many we couldn't see straight, which brings me to our next culinary creation and crap picture.

I have been eyeing these vegan deviled eggs for some time now. I first saw them way back when on VeganAide's blog. (See my last blog and just click on her name). Then a couple of days ago I was over at Amandah's blog again (check last post and click there too) and she whipped some up, after she saw Mo's blog (not my cooking buddy, Mo but another Mo) who also whipped up.

Well you know what I mean. Anyway, they look and taste like the real deal but then again who remembers what the real deal tastes like. Apparently I had egg on my face (or on my eyes) when I took the pic.

So kitschy! So good.

So tell me, does it take you close to a lifetime to nibble on a carrot or do you inhale your food? My mommy wants to know.